You can get addicted to a certain kinda sadness 
Like resignation to the end, always the end 
So when we found that we could not make sense 
Well you said that we would still be friends But I'll admit that I was glad that it was over
#gotye

Moving on to a new year.

Why we should stop wondering why

detoxed my mind with food. ohtheirony

You’re not there yet, but perhaps you’re halfway to that point. After all, life constantly moves forward. The heart doesn’t break. It’s a muscle, and it can only get stronger.

#tc

“For the past has taught
to not be caught,
in what is not
worth pursuing ---” 

 Langleav

Focus on what you have rather than what you dont. 
A happy heart makes  a happy soul and a happy person. =)

i think ultimately just know that you are doing best. am i ?
certainly not the best but im trying.


OK TIME TO DO WHAT I NEED TO DO.

Chocolate
Cheese
Coffee
Chilli
Cakes

A foodie kind of 5Cs.

"Wanting to leave is enough reason to go" tc

So tired of failures =/

“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.” ― Jim Morrison


PANIC MODE ON.
damn submission. my adrenaline has been pumping the enture day i swear. tell me how to finish. CRIES

omy.tell me how am i going to finish this. GG

http://thoughtcatalog.com/elle-holmes/2013/11/5-reasons-why-single-ladies-stay-single/

ditto

Foggedmind.I'm so over this shit. Moveon.

"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't."
Eleanor Roosevelt

too much indifference lately.
cant be bothered.

oh school. oh thesis. 

so uninspired. sighs.

“I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” ― Marilyn Monroe

‘I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we’ll never know most of them. But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there.’ 

Imploding

Chocolate or beer?

“This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And baby, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soulmate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.” ― Marilyn Monroe

"Of course, you never really forget anyone, but you certainly release them. You stop allowing their history to have any meaning for you today. You let them change their haircut, let them move, let them fall in love again. And when you see this person you have let go, you realize that there is no reason to be sad. The person you knew exists somewhere, but you are separated by too much time to reach them again." ― Chelsea Fagan

Head hurting madly worksighswork.

Omy hate staying up

ytd dinner conversation was a mix of laughter and confusion over life matters.
but somehow i think we came to the conclusion that to live is to be happy and fuck what others think.
just live ur life like a firework or a simple bland tofu however u want it.

cheers.
be happy everybody =)

#unfeel

“Be nice. Be good. Be happy. If people everywhere were to keep to this simple creed, there'd be few problems left in the world to fret about.” ― Richelle E. Goodrich

Drink up with me now
And forget all about the pressure of days
Do what I say and I'll make you okay
And drive them away
The images stuck in your head


The people you've been before
That you don't want around anymore
That push and shove and won't bend to your will
I'll keep them still

I think I think and I overthink.

Don't let me see u khxbye.

Mindfucked

“Recovery is something that you have to work on every single day and it’s something that it doesn’t get a day off.” – Demi Lovato

"When I see an old movie, like from the ’40s or ’50s or ’60s, the people look so calm. They don’t have smart phones, they’re not looking at computer screens, they’re taking their time. They’ll sit in a chair and just stare off into space. I think some day we’ll find our way back to that garden of Eden." — Rudy Rucker

Waking up everyday this week feeling like shitz.

Maybe I should care less

"... the memories made me sad and happy all at the same time. But if I could tell my young self what I know now, I’d remind her that this is just a natural process in life. Sometimes it’s controllable, but other times, it’s out of our power and there’s a time to let go. People that you were once inseparable from are now merely strangers."

Obviously life never gives u want u want.

So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn't know I was lost

mehdissertationmeh.

Escape

day 3 insanity.imustntbelazy

“Like it takes so little not only to change something, but to make you forget the way it once was, as well.” ― Sarah Dessen, Lock and Key

I'm blessed.each time I think any was I have I gotta say I'm really blessed.what more can I ask.

Let's go insanity!

Spare me the agony of tt sight.

Needs to forget all that needs to be forgotten.
=/

Our hopes and expectations
Black holes & revelations

word

On a school day it's a struggle with the bed.囧

They say it's what you make
I say it's up to fate
It's woven in my soul
I need to let you go
Your eyes, they shine so bright
I want to save their light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how



Don't get too close
It's dark inside
It's where my demons hide
It's where my demons hide

When you feel ashamed go to the river
When you're feeling sad go to the river
When you're feeling blue inside, immersed and tied
When you're feeling stuck in pain, forever

Go go go go in your soul you
Try to fly but never get high you're
Low low - wishing for the
Tide to rise - hold your feelings inside
Side side side - let the river glide and
Slow slow, the winter will go you
Know know know - with everything you'll grow
Whatever comes will go

Lingering

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart,
I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask,
I want to exorcise the demons from your past,
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

Just a short dinner.but as life gets the better of us and everyone starts getting busier with work.
Such little moments I treasure.

So tired

I count on countless good occasions
To be quick and to the point

To perceive the situation
But a constant hesitation
Has been turning me around
Here is hope you can still take it

Limbo. Forever in limbo.

Sighsssssssssssssssssssss.Jialattttttttttttt

Dissertationdamndoomdoordie.

“The harder you fall, the heavier your heart; the heavier your heart, the stronger you climb; the stronger you climb, the higher your pedestal.” ― Criss Jami

Would rather have amnesia.

Oh dissertation oh dissertation ohdiediedies

Feeling bleh. Bleh then bleh now.

The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before.

When the truth hits u.

Actually it's nt a bad thing as afterall.

The weather is one kind of hot.
And my head is one kind of pain.

Urgh

Sleep in the day.work at night.

Nocturnal.

other than home, these are the 2 tt i like best.

Damn headache go away

The national day song is urgggghhhhhhh

I have no words to describe it.omyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Chronic headache.

seeing friends graduate seem so surreal. u just realise how time flies.
those were the days we were worrying about tests and exams and now everyone's out into the working world.

but we are still us. a piece of us just wanna the young us we all used to it.
love this feeling =))))

Wahlaoooooo I wanna grad also

come let me make u a margarita

Cat wait for next year to fly by. Sighs

It's time.

Society forces us to present ourselves to please the eyes of others.

But the most important thing I realise is to be urself. For being urself makes us happier beings. Who cares how others sees us! I don't need u to like me. For who matters don't mind and those who mind don't matter.

Thoughts and struggles of the mind every now and then.sighsss.

Sinksanksunk.

Let's have a beer.

Just wandering.
where's ur destination ?

we all live in our own bubbles.


perhaps the permeability of each bubbles make us different individuals.
I like my bubble.
and i dislike it at the same time.

but please dont poke or burst my bubble.



obviously floating in my bubble.( which is floating as well)
right. bring my awayyyyy.

Wakeup.

Life.

HAHAHAA. how can anyone not love gordonramsay. he cracks me up all the time.

Will you ever wonder why?
I am real but you can’t feel
All that you erase and kill
I will fly away from here
All you took will disappear
Was it my dream?

And so Gordon Ramsay is coming.

The challenge isn't going to be fair, in my opinion. Ramsay is gd at what he does and so are the hawkers here. How to compare?

Looking forward to his incessant swearings though!Lol.

Oh I irrigate illusions
Then let them grow
How can I pacify myself
And let go?
And I run wild to see
Who I turned out to be

Wakinguptosmelllyair

Damnuindo!

It comes alive
And I die a little more

Each moment here I die a little more

Then the unnamed feeling
It comes alive
Then the unnamed feeling
Takes me away

#insomnia

now that i have spread
my wings now
i don't want to fly
away from here
i want to stay forever,
make things better
i try hard to learn
new things you better
work real hard on your beliefs
instead of fighting together,
work together

Only used fitness pal app for a day already finding it ridiculous.



Instead of enjoying my food, i found myself thinking of those numbers that add on to my cal intake.
Life is more than just calories seriously.
whatsorceryisthat.deleted!

but...


when you fight and fight and fight, well,
Well, there goes half your life
And there are no good byes.


Why are you fighting? - onelinedrawing


different interpretation. 
we all fight for different reasons. 

" Singapore is the sum of a hundred diaspora: at night,  it seems like everyone is dreaming about somewhere else"  Peter Schoppert

Just books and coffee.

Looking through baking recipes gets me excited.lol

dissertation y u like that.

Y arent there play stop fast forward rewind buttons in life?

=[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[

Let's suck it up n move on!

Sometimes when I'm alone,I wonder
Is that a spell that I'm under.
Keeping me from seeing the real thing.

Incubus.

I think my heart just sank.but then again.isn't tt better.

What a holiday.
I dunno wts I'm doing.
Sighs.

I thank God for mummy. Who has been the strongest female I know.
I wish she was less self sacrificial n treat herself better though!
Lots of love mummy!

Living in oblivion

Things seem to gt clearer. And you would have thought it was impossible. But poofpoof. It's gone before you could have noticed.

Release. Relief.

Ok.so everyone is flying everywhere.n im kinda stuck here.

Guaguagua

Flu strikes. Grahhhh

Sis says I'm like an owl.
Slp in the day.
Awake at night.

O.O

Grahhh.I wanna quit sch.

looks like a trip's coming up ! =D

Considering gg for a run tmr.
That is If I ever pull my lazyass off the bed.

MEGA囧

17 more hours to 3500 words essay.
im till at my 700 word mark.



AIYAH. PRINT 5 copies can le lah. FML



let me jiong more times
囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧

JIONG 囧

囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧囧

Can't do this intellectual pos. Megasighs.

The first time when i ever had an all- nighter was for a geog paper in sec1. basically bcos there was too many things to memorize. ( i was kinda proud of my achievement)

now 10 years down the road, i see y i can survive with little slp.
THOUGH I LOVE SLP VERY MUCH.

but as the years passed, i cant really do allnighters. 1 all nighter = the next day gone.


ok. its 630am. due to procastination from the previous day tts y im still rushing out for a ppt later at 10am.
sucks


oh well. i love slp. I DO VERY MUCH.
SIGHS. who to blame but myself.

So many things.
but no direction.

oh come on, lets get some things done.

Too many superficial beings.

Words tt sting.etched at the back of ur mind.
Damnn. =\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

When ppl try to put u down.sighs.

My friend says I keep too much too myself.
Typical capricorn.

Convinced of the right decision.

6hours slp in 4 days.I'm dying.
Takbolehtahanlaaaaaaahmdamn

Shagggggggggedtttttttm

Finding out abt  the Boston tradegy after whining abt my tough sch life.

I take back my words.
May God bless those affected.

Fuckkkk just let me slp.

Angstttttmuch.

Too many things too little time.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.

ohman. fts=//////////////

damn sick of work and sch. damn

I have never find it hard to pull myself up from a nap in a long time.year4naplikeaboss.

Lookahead.

Ohwells.I cant please evryone.

Trying hard to Inject some positivism while mind goes fts repeatedly.

Argh Fts.

life is good when u can just sleep all u want.



At some pt of life, we stop caring.
does it matter?
we wish we were different.
but on the other hand,
we convince ourselves
just be yourself.



rants at 4am.

Fatdieme is when u have a holy chocolate muffin at 1am.

=O

It's different now I swear
There's something in the air tonight
And I can only stare at the glimmer of the night lights
And what I used to be scared of is making me aware of why

And my hope still scrapes the sky 
Like all these buildings I will try 
To leave the world behind until my head is clear

Icandothisicandothiaicandothisicansothisicandothis.

=/ =( =/ =( =/ =(

wip =)

Crit tmr but feeling like a nua.sighs.

I WANNA JUST LIE IN BED AND NOT DO ANYTHING. 

Just drank coffee n 5mins later
Sleepy spell hits.argh readingggggsssssss

Actually I shld be used to tt by now.

Shagggggggggedtttttttm. HAIS.wo yao shui jiaooooo

The workload is crazy. Guaguagua.

Fts.drowning In readings when I have more impt stuff to do.arghhhhh.

Zero motivation
Zero energy

Hao lei ah.

yesterday after a long day at school

came home.
had dinner.
bathed and slept through till this morning.

was a gd slp nonetheless.

we have all aged. havent we?

Fuckedup day.

Fed up with all these nonsense.

Oh, let's get rich and buy our parents homesIn the south of FranceLet's get rich and give everybody nice sweatersAnd teach them how to danceLet's get rich and build our house on a mountainMaking everybody look like ants

From way up there, you and I, you and I

Ohwellllllllzzzzzzzzzzzzzssss

Yeeeeeammmmmmoooohhhhhhhhhh

Tired.
N its nt tt I didn't slp

My brain just keeps telling me
U are tired
Go slp

N so i did
N its telling me yhe same thing again

At this rate,
Nth's gonna gt done

it moves on.
then it bounces back.
again and again.



Sometimes,
i tell myself
Faith is all that we need
we just got to have faith.

faith overcomes everything.


but.
if it only my faith was stronger.

grahhh.


time to focus.
dissertation =/

Great is our GOD

These damn arcs. Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh

i really dislike sunday nights. rahrahrah.

Omg. This ia prolly one reason why I can't wait for this sem to end.tiredddddddddddd. Booooooooo

Keep giving me hope for a better dayKeep giving love to find a wayThrough this messy life
I made for myselfHeaven knows I need a little

Hope for a better day, a little love to find a wayThrough this heaviness
I feel just need someone to say,
everything's okayEverything's okay

earworm.

And I tell myself.
No it must nt happen again.

late nights have become increasing intolerable.
im getting old.

=(

#chineseyigepro.
WAH. how did i even do it when all the assignments were written in chi.

wo de zhing wen hen hao yo.LOLLOL

So tired just let me sleep =/

THE SECRET LIST I CAME UP WITH WHEN MY TOLERANCE WAS WAY UP TO MY NECK
 my xxxxx  is a fucking annoying bcos
1) she freaking talks to herself.
  (the day starts by her waking up. and then she goes OWWW.
somewhere's pain. here pain or there pain. or gasps in exasperation at wadsoever
or exclaiming out loud at sth on facebook. LIKE SERIOUSLY. WONT U JUST BE QUIET
2) she is freaking inconsiderate
   the whole time in the room when im like doing work. she's watching her shows
and laughing and cackling like freaking damn hyena.
this situation could also repeat itself even at 2am into the night, WTF
OR WHEN IM ALRDY IN BEDm MAJORWTFTMDTTM
3) she is freaking dirty.
i have n idea how she can leave her food lying ard on her desk without sealing them up
like a packet of unfinished rice widely exposed and she goes off for the
weekend. OHMYFUCK.i dun thunk i welcome pests ard yallnoe?!
4) point 3 + on a more extreme mode
she shaves her armpits infront of the sink. and leave those hair lying ard.
ohmyfuck wont u take just 1 min to clear them away. fucking gross. ( on an added note) she shaves
naked in front of the sink ( even when im around ) wtf.
5) she is one fucking gross and weird person
so our toilet manhole gets clogged with hair. She pushes them all the way to the corner of the toilet
and it justs remains there. I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING toilet CLEANER CLEARING ALL THESE HAIR COUNTLESS TIMES
if nt it will just remain there and accumulate. and lately it climbed up the walls
like the climber plants( GROSSS wtf is she doing )
6) her wadsapp ringtone rings nonstop and she doesnt switches it to silent mode. so for eg. when she gets 6 msgs on wadsapp one after another. and her ringtone is some whistle tt goes ( ooo ooo ooo wheee oooo) so when it's 6 times its oooo ooo ooo oooo oo....wheee oooo oooo oooo wheee... alright u get wad i mean. it justs annoying.

THE END.YAY THE END.